Romans 8:26 and what to do when you don't know how to pray

Many people think prayer is something other people are good at. They picture someone with the right words, calm and fluent, and compare it with their own stumbling attempts. Romans 8 takes a different view, and it is worth reading slowly.

What the verse says

“Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.” (Romans 8:26, KJV)

Paul is writing to Christians in Rome, and he includes himself: “we know not what we should pray for as we ought.” The apostle does not claim to have prayer figured out. He says that the weakness is real and shared.

The word “infirmities”

In the King James Version, “infirmities” means weaknesses. The verse says the Spirit helps us in that weakness, and one example of the weakness is that we do not always know what to ask for. Sometimes we do not know what to want. Sometimes we want two opposite things. Sometimes the situation is too heavy for any request to feel right.

The verse does not say we should pray better. It says the Holy Spirit helps us.

The setting: suffering and hope

This verse is about more than finding eloquent words. Just before it, Paul describes creation groaning and believers who “groan within ourselves,” waiting for “the redemption of our body” (Romans 8:22-23, KJV). The Spirit helps us in the middle of that suffering, when we cannot see clearly what to ask for.

“Groanings which cannot be uttered”

Paul’s assurance rests on the Holy Spirit’s intercession. Even when we do not know what to ask for, the Spirit helps us in our weakness and intercedes for us according to God’s will (Romans 8:26-27). Christians understand the precise nature of these groanings differently, but the central promise is clear: our inability to express ourselves does not prevent the Spirit from helping us. We can keep turning to God without treating prayer as a test of eloquence.

The surrounding comfort

Romans 8 is a chapter of reassurance. It begins with “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1, KJV) and ends with the promise that nothing “shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:39, KJV). Verse 26 sits in the middle of that. The point of the chapter is not that you have to hold yourself together. It is that, in Christ, you are held.

Four ways to keep praying when words fail

Romans 8:26 does not prescribe these. They are ordinary Christian practices that can help us keep turning to God.

1. Say it plainly. “God, I don’t know what to say” is a real prayer. So is “Help.” Jesus said, “Your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him” (Matthew 6:8, KJV).
2. Use a prayer someone else wrote. The Psalms and the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13) can help us in these moments. Read one slowly and let it carry you.
3. Write it down. Some people can pray more easily with a pen. Write a letter to God without editing it.
4. Sit quietly with a verse. Silence by itself is not automatically prayer, but a few quiet minutes with a verse in mind, turning your heart toward God, can be. Our guided Bible meditation page includes a short quiet step for this.

When prayer feels like nothing

Sometimes prayer feels empty for a long stretch, and it can be worrying. If that is where you are, it may help to tell a trusted friend, pastor or counselor, especially if you are also feeling low or hopeless. Praying is not a performance that you have to pass. Romans 8:26 is in the Bible because people have always found prayer hard, and God’s help does not depend on how well you do it.

If you would like a short prayer to start with today, open the Verse of the Day and read the prayer that goes with it, or choose a feeling on the home page.